Well...I'm using one hand typing and I can tell you it hurts!!  They gave me Vicodin that did not work, they now have me on Darvocet.  At least it gives me some relief but not much.  What are they afraid to give drugs out these days?  Having been a burn patient for over 2 months and getting a shot daily of morphine to get in the tub my tolerance is very high for drugs.  This stuff hurts, my hand is swollen and I can't even pull up my pants when I go to the bathroom!!  I know too much information huh?  Well, typed enough really hurting now, hope everyone has a good hump day

On my way to the hospital, have to be there at 6, I'm the first surgery scheduled for 8.  Didn't get much sleep last night...I get a little anxious with this stuff.  After spending two months in the hospital when I was burned I have all these reservations.  My veins hide and they have a hard time poking me with the IV, so needless to say I look like a pin cushin afterwards.  I am beginning to get a little dopey (finally) they gave me Valium to start taking last night to expel the anxiety.

Hope everyone has a great start to their week, might be a few before I get back and I'm able to visit everyone site.  Know that I'll read my daily SIR's email and keep up with what's going on.

Ciao Bella

Went to the hospital today for my pre-op appointment.  I couldn't believe it....my appointment was at 2:10, the doctor came into the room at 3:05 extended his hand and said sorry I'm a little late!  Can you believe it?  I was so hot I didn't know what to say, except of course "A little late, my appointment was at 2:10, I think that is a little bit longer than a little late"!  I was looking for an excuse to just walk out but know I would have been in a lot of trouble with the hubby if I had of.  I have been putting off this surgery for several years.  So come Monday morning off I go to have my left wrist done for carpel tunnel.  It is of course by far the worst, partly because of the prior injury from the fire.  I used my wrists to break out the window to try to get the kids out.  So needless to say my left wrist ended up with the tendon sliced in half.  They told me when I was in the hospital that I would never use the baby finger and ring finger again...certainly proved them wrong!

Looks like my cousin is going to be able to get care at UCSF.  We finally got someone in gear that working for her and cutting through all the red tape, YEAH!!

Everyone have a good week and I'll get back as soon as I can.

Here's hoping that all my Xangan friends are having a good weekend.  The weather is beautiful here, makes me want to get out and start planting and working in the yard.  But alas, I know it is too early and it could still get mighty cold and kill everything.  On to my dilemma

I'm hoping that some of you can help me what my cousin is going through right now.  Her husband (now deceased) was retired from the service...so she is going to the Air Force hospital in Fairfield, Ca (Travis).  They are sending her to an outside Oncologist because all the support staff have been deployed (geeze, wonder where to?), so they are very few nurses there.  Subsequently why they have authorized her to go to one from their approved list.  Since I have never dealt with the military I'm at a loss of how hard to push these guys.  Will it interfere with how they treat her, supply her, etc.?  This is serious stuff and I do not feel they are attacking this at the speed they should be.  Is that normal...is that because she is at the bottom of the food-chain within their realm of things?  Do I need to get nasty? (which by the way I can do).

She is not doing well at all.  Not sure I indicated all that is wrong with her or not, so if this is a repeat just look at it as a brain fart.  Not only is she dealing with the cancer in both lungs, she has severe COPD as well as asthma.  The PETscan said that it was confined to just the lungs and that they are small lesions (right now).  But we need to attack this aggressively and not be submissive to this nasty thing.

Sorry I haven't been around to everyone's site lately, between work and the 2 hour drive back and forth to her place and during the week to Travis has not been leaving very much time for me.  I'll eventually get back in the grove of things, thanks for being patient.  At least I do usually read all your blogs via my SIR email so I'm keeping up with what's going on. 

The best to each and everyone of you.  I'll be back soon

This is going to be a short entry to let everyone know that it was not good news yesterday   They found 2 spots on her right lung and 1 on her left.  They are sending her to an Oncologist so they will determine what the next phase of treatment she will undergo.  Please keep her in your prayers, she will need it. 

If there are any smokers out there please, please quite smoking, before it's too late for you!!!

Everyone have a great weekend.

A quick hello to everyone, things have been crazy and I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel just yet.  I am going with my cousin tomorrow to get the results of her PET scan.  They told her last week that her results would be reviewed with the board of doctors and then determine the route they would be taking for her treatment.  I know she is expecting the worst!  If you can keep her in your prayers I would appreciate it.

On a lighter note I have been doing my part to stimulate the economy lately.  We purchased a new table and 6 chairs for the kitchen...one that looks like it can be either formal or not and will be delivered this Friday.  We also ordered a new cocktail table, 2 end tables and sofa table for the family room, not sure when they will be arriving yet.  This is going to make a big change in the appearance within our home, we will be going from light wood to dark wood. 

Hope everyone has a great Wednesday, take care.

Wow, what a great day I woke up to yesterday morning....Someone thinks I'm awful special this year! 

Now for the next piece....the heart had a package in there as well.  I have a gold charm bracelet that I add charms to usually at Christmas each year.  Well within the heart there was 2 gold charms of boys heads with my sons name on each one.  If you don't remember I lost both of my sons in a house fire.  Do I have a special guy or what? 

He also bought a fountain for the front room as well, can't wait to get it together and take a picture, very unusual.

Hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's Day.

In this life I'm a woman.

In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear.

When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months.  I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.  I could deal with that, too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute cuddly cubs.  I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business.  You swat anyone who bothers your cubs.

If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.  I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling.

He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup...gonna be a bear.

  It's hump day.....

I'm at work and received this from a co-worker, thought it was very soothing and thought I would pass it on to the Xangan community.

http://www.theinterviewwithgod.com/

Sorry I haven't been around much lately, I don't think it would have mattered since those Xanga gods were not being very cooperative!  My cousin who is just about the only family member I have left had a severe asthma attack last weekend and almost died.  She lives about 2 hours from us up north and I have spent a lot of time going back and forth this week as well as I will need to for the next couple of weeks.  They found a spot on her lung and she now needs to have a biopsy...and she is scared...very scared!  She has 2 daughters, one in Washington the other in the service in Germany.  Darla (daughter in service) will be here today for a week to see if we can get things going for her.

Sorry I haven't been to your sites...I'll get back into the swing of things once I get her though this.  We are trying to talk her into selling her place and moving very close to us so she has more of a support system.

Our hearts go out to the family's of the astronauts on the Columbia...